The past few times that I have had the opportunity to enjoy my moments at my torch I have been focused on creating something specific. Custom orders, beads for upcoming shows, beads to list in my Etsy or ArtFire stores and alas a little something for myself. I recently purchased a cuff bracelet made of turquoise, sparkling seed beads and some brown stoney looking beads. I want to create a pendant that is similar in color with a textural look to wear with this bracelet. So far I have not been satisfied with the results. Apparently, I am my own worst customer. I have created some pretty beads but I have not captured the look I want to pair with my new bracelet. (This will be a story for another day.)
My plan for today was to make beads, my plan would be to try again to capture that perfect pendant for myself. As I began I felt frustrated. I did not want to work with "those" colors again. Ugggh! I was just not into today. "But I want to make beads so what will I make?" I was not coming up with any of my usual ideas. So I decided to stop thinking and just do. This felt so freeing for me. I tend to be a thinker and can think a subject or idea to no end. But today, in my moment, I was free. I didn't think or plan. I just picked up a colored rod that looked good to me and began to wind the glass onto the mandrel. There was no preconceived plan, stringers were pulled on the fly, matching colors were picked in the moment. I found myself happy and satisfied to just let it all go. I didn't worry too much about winding the glass perfectly balanced on the mandrel, if it wasn't perfect when I squished the glass I would figure out a way to embellish the bead to make a balanced bead. I am tired of all the to do lists and the planning. Today I just need to be and create.